Another week of chocolate

Which also coincided with the week where we seemed to only have one topic to talk about.

The internship. A bit about that later.
So the week that's just gone past we did another round of chocolate... bonbons and honestly, they were really good! I love cookbooks but I had never been interested to buy a chocolate book, until last week. It's my current bedtime reading.

We made 12 different kinds of bonbons and my top three favourites in descending order are : Capuccinno, bi-couches passion/pâte de fruit abricot, and miel/orange. I love dipping them actually, though I really get annoyed when they don't look neat and chef kept saying that it wasn't a race and to do them properly.. He shouldn't probably say that because then I really took my bloody own sweet time and was behind everybody. On top of that my chocolate wasn't looking ok and I had to re-do the tempering 3-4 times and especially towards the end, it was thickening up abnormally. Grrrr, anywho I still love it and I really want to be good at it technically... maybe I should save up my measly internship salary to study further or buy a slab of marble or something.

So, about the internship.
Ummm it was announced on Monday evening, and I was deeply upset. I really thought that my chef considered me a mediocre underperformer :-/ and that's why he chose a place that for me was completely underwhelming. I am not keen on the products that they sell... and I thought that was most inconsiderate of him because I trusted him to choose something suitable and yet I really felt I was getting the leftover. Umm I don't go berserk often ok.... but I did this week, just a bit... that nowadays I feel a bit sheepish thinking about how inappropriate it was. But I was dissapointed because I felt that he had no confidence that I could make it through. Anyway, nowadays I prefer to think that maybe chef thought he was doing me a favour, because he said yes he chose the place because it would suit me and that they would look after you and Melinda, you are VERY slow... (thanks) so maybe he chose that place to protect me because I am small, slow and getting old (thanks). I didn't really expect him to forgive and forget that fast because he was angry at me for having been rude at him but after all the drama, (because actually he is very nice and honestly it was my fault, I should've controlled my emotion better) he said that he had already made another arrangement for me (thank you...) for which I really appreciate. . It's not all confirmed at all and I haven't been called in for an interview... but today I saw that the chef of the place had been recommended by Facebook as a "friend I might know". Ummm if he had been checking me out on fb I hope I gave a good impression. Anyway, I see it as a good sign and so fingers crossed. XX

On Thursday we did a presentation of our chocolates and took many photos and then we boxed them all into many ballotins that look like gold bars. Happy days! Because also on top of that, chef asked us to do croissant dough for Friday... I'd been wanting to practice croissant again because my last batch wasn't great. On Friday we also made some baba dough, which is great... because it allowed us to practice for the creative challenge! My croissants turned out not too bad, but far from perfect. One mystery about the shaping for me at least was solved and so I am happy about that, and by Friday I am again lovey dovey with chef Stévy hahaha he is the best!

One of my group mates made this yesterday, and I LOVE it so much! Everyone's got their own little detail and the ressemblance is quite uncanny. She is soooo talented my friend!! I can't believe that we only have 4 more weeks to go before we won't see each other everyday. Three weeks of classes and the very last week we are (just like in high school) going on a study trip! Group A and B are going together to Rennes and Vannes, 3 days 2 nights train trips and bus trips. I think I will be feeling bittersweet, I don't like partings...

Melinda xx

Ps. One of my fondest memory from last year was the Race to Survive (from which, months in advance I wanted to pull out many times because I didn't think I could do it but nobody let me), it turned out that the terrain was really tough even adult men said so, when we were 'racing' (or more like struggling really) people around me all said that I could do it and dragged me along when I most needed it, nobody ever told me to throw in the towel and give up and anyway it never crossed my mind to quit halfway. We had been warned that internship is going to be very tough, I just hope my little body don't break, wish me luck! I think I can do this!

The chocolate week one and week two

(Also known as the two weeks with the substitute teacher)

I actually gave a glowing review of the program during my mid term interview, because really I had so far had a good impression of the school. I am so lucky because I am in the BEST group, my group mates are lovely, I love our chef, our lab is brand new, I am learning a lot and what I like the most is that I'm learning to become a professional and that's exactly what I want.

But then I was asked if I had anything to add and I then expressed my displeasure that I didn't appreciate the fact we have 8 labs coming up without our chef. So that took place the past couple weeks, time flew by as usual and for once though I didn't mind so much. The sub teacher was ok, honestly he wasn't bad at all and he was very nice and polite but it was just different let's put it that way.

The fortnight started with a Monday public holiday, and on Tuesday we were with chef and we made 3 different kinds of gateaux de voyage and all three were good! I only took one home but I tried all of them. The next day, we made another 3 different cakes but even though they were pretty good and all looked quite pretty, I'd rather not put on more weight!! My birthday is coming and I just want to feel good about myself. Mid life crisis you say? Maybe....

On Thursday we started working with chocolate, our little project was to make a chocolate bonsai and sub teacher was quite organised, at the end of the day we had the pot and tree bark ready. Working the chocolate and shape it into a bark was HARD! Honestly I think my bonsai bark was one of the smallest because it was just bloddy difficult, it kept breaking and falling apart. Regardless what I just said, maybe because it's all new to me... I am completely fascinated by chocolate right now. I love to temper, I like that there is a science to it, that you have to be precise, that when you make a mistake... chocolate forgives, you can remelt and start again. What a magic substance!

We finished our masterpieces on Friday, and all day we had visitors who came to admire our work, sub chef was very happy and proud and we too were happy. It was an uplifting Friday. I was kind of looking forward for the following week which was just the week past, a very busy week! On Monday and Tuesday we made 4 large chocolate eggs, they weren't easy to make and my eggs were far from perfect.

Then we spent two days to make a lapin cretin. We made it out of different sized egg moulds and round mould for the eyes, it was very DIY and I don't know... difficult as it was, surely it shouldn't have taken so long to make ? I did enjoy making this piece but it was really like heart attack central in the oven room when we had to spray our lapin and our chocolate structure. I now look at chocolate show pieces on Instagram with a different pair of eyes... Amazement, because honestly... it's not easy peasy to make at all! On Friday we finalised the piece and I was just glad that I managed to not break my lapin nor my chocolate structure. At least 4 of us broke their lapin and had to patch it all up.. if that happened to me it would've probably been really difficult for me to catch up because I am still a bit slower than others.

Having said that though, I think I could pat myself in the back for having finished in the middle pack the past couple of weeks. My chef said to me during the interview that I think too much! I never realised that maybe I had been umming and aahing for a tad too long before I do something but so I consciously have been trying not to. So it's been like oh you have to attach both halves of the eggs together I was like ok bang bang bang. In the end one half got stuck onto a wrong half, the (not very) delicate dentelle should've gone with the roughly brushed half and I used a smooth egg half. I didn't stop to think but the job gets done and it wasn't the end of the world that I made a mistake HAH normally I would definitely get upset! Oh we have to cut the bunny's face for the mouth ok, let's cut.. normally I would stop and stare at the eyeless mouthless head for a few minutes to decide where I will cut the mouth where the eyes will go etc. In the end I think I was happier to have finished in good time rather than stressing out at the end trying to not be the very last and finished the piece poorly and gets disappointed in the end. So, well done me hehe.

Next week, our chef is back and a month to the day... it would be our last day at school. I am officially sad because I get along really well with my group buddies and we spent many hours everyday 5-6 days a week I will definitely miss seeing them everyday... (I think as for my cold hearted chef though... we would be replaced by a new batch of Anglo students and forgotten BOOO!!!).

You cross path then you say good bye. I hate that, mais c'est comme ça la vie.

Melinda xx

ps. I miss you Sydney friends xx

The week we had our mid term interview

Last week felt like a busy week maybe because the week before when we were not with our chef, we didn't have any TA class and the labs were very low tempo. Monday morning, I sauntered into the lab and my friend said .. do you know we are having an evaluation! WHAT?? Ah but when I found out it's Succès, ah chill... I would prefer a surprise evaluation than a weekend where I would be thinking about it. The succès was to be decorated with chocolate and after I scrolled on the posts I've liked on insta I decided to attempt this crown pretty looking thing that would go nicely and give some height.

Honestly! Instagram could be so deceiving sometimes! The short video makes it look so simple to do .. but bugger! it was so not do-able at all! I tried three times!! Anyway by then I started to panic because I hadn't made a single thing of chocolate decor and time ticked tocked really fast when you are under pressure. Bah! In the end my succès looked so unattractive I didn't take any photo. Normally, the pass/fail criteria for the evaluation is if sell-able then you get 10+ and if not then below 10. Chef said my sponge was ok, the colour was a touch under ... and the butter cream no problem but the rosaces could've been piped higher... I passed, but personally I wouldn't buy it. Maybe he should change the criteria to .. would people buy it ? because sure... you can put them out for sale but what if nobody buys them? right? But then again I think I would be getting under 10 and might end up developing some sort of depression haha.

On Tuesday, we made the mini choux and the nougatine for the croquembouche. Rolling out the nougatine was such a work out and you try to mould it into a baking pan to make the base, 2 seconds later ... Ouchy! So hot! If you wait around until it's cooler the nougatine mix will harden quickly and you would only get 1-2 meagre pieces everytime. It is a good thing to work with fast people... because I will try to keep up, and that day I was lucky to pair up with Bhupar mr rapidos. I didn't want to slow him down and I think I came in FIRST with all my pieces of nougatine lined up on a tray... UNBELIEVABLE!

On Wednesday morning I came in for my midterm interview with Brigitte and my chef. I had heard from the guys who had had their interview that you would be asked how you found the program so far, which I thought was a bit weird... I thought the evaluation was to review how I progressed so far like when I had a performance review at work more or less. But so yes, no it wasn't. How do you feel about the program? about the art class, about the wine class, about the demo, the excursions? Any remarks to add? euh yes, bla bla bla.

And then finally when we got to talk a bit about how I was faring... How do you think you are doing so far? Average. How is your French going? ok. About your internship, any thoughts? I had already decided to let chef decide for me because I trust him to have my best interest in mind. So I said, I leave it up to him but I also added that... (of course I secretly wanted to be placed in a hotel because of the prestige) my background is the hotel industry so I naturally would probably go for jobs at a hotel when I go back. Chef then said, you know how hotel works already then... so no *SLAM* I said euh I worked in the corporate office though not in the hotel... No hotel for you, it would be too tough for you, said my chef extinguishing my little hope. OH. So then ? In a shop. Okay. Get your CV and cover letter ready in French and you will later have to go to see the chef and have an interview in French, you ok with that? Fine.

Initially I was completely ok with chef saying no re: hotels because I had heard the hours are mighty long and hard work... but then during lunch I was chatting with a girl in my class and she's tiny! I think I look more solid (fat) compared to her and she told me that when she said she wanted to go to a 5 star hotel.. chef said that it would be hard work bla bla but he thought that she would be ok. When I first heard that I suddenly felt disheartened, whyyyyyy??? she and I are quite on par in class I thought. I was feeling a bit down for half a day or so but after some reflection... honestly I think I don't have the stamina for 12 hour days doing physical work 5-6 days a week not even if I was 15 years younger. So I am not envious anymore.

In the afternoon, we built our croquembouches. I really like building it.. and even though I'm not good in decorating 'free style' at all, in the end it looked ok, even quite pretty. We finished just before 8pm that evening it was a long day... and our croquembouches tragically ended up in the trash at the end of the day.

Thursday was a big day because we had another evaluation and this one was no surprise. It was the éclairs & religieuses & Royale evaluation that we had to miss because of the gas explotion. I actually ended up failing both my éclairs & religieuses (10 and 8 out of 20!) they were both overcooked and especially the religieuses they are all singed at the collar... black as charcoal they were. CRAP. My éclairs were too fat and looked so homemade. I cringed at how they look. Chef said the cream was ok, how I filled them was ok, choux pastry not too bad, Royale looked ok, the mousse he said he saw it was fine, my decoration as usual was awful. You know considering how much time I waste on instagram looking at pretty cakes I would learn to decorate better, but NO. But I really liked this evaluation because I felt like I had to really go go go otherwise I wouldn't finish on time, it was quite a thrill :)

Thursday afternoon we had a demo by a MOF in cuisine Fabrice Desvignes and it was great!!! I was tuning in completely and really, he was great and funny and seems very nice. The plated desserts that he made were pretty and at the end of the day I was so motivated to try harder on the presentation which so far often lets me down.

Friday, it was éclair redemption time. I love all the choux pastry family and it's ridiculous that I still couldn't make nice ones. I piped and repiped several times until I was relatively happy with the shape. Luckily they came out looking ok, at least they weren't cracking too too much and rather nice and slim. I had a bit of trouble with my caramel au beurre salé at first ... woah panic central because it looked a bit oily and strange but chef fixed it. Phew. I added a bit more salt to taste and I loved it! On top of that, one of them looked pretty good, it was a small victory for me... (even though the other 9 were still pretty moche!)

My gâteau basque.... argh I shouldn't had cared about being left behind the pack and could've left it in the blast freezer for another 5 minutes and it would've probably made a big difference. My egg wash too could had been a bit thinner I think, the egg wash was catching at the fork the pattern was not marked clearly and so it didn't come out as pretty as the others. It is still pretty good though, I quite like it.

Friday morning we had class where we were given recipes for this coming week... it would be a week of gâteaux de voyages.... and for the next two weeks, except for one day, we would be with a replacement teacher. Grumble grumble... I know that my chef can't be my chef forever but whilst I'm still at school at least. Anyway we'll see... no expectations no disappointment right? Grumble grumble...

During the midterm interview chef asked whether I was happy, it took me a second or two to answer because I had to stop and examine how I felt... I answered yes, I was (and am) happy. I have to mention that because ahhh, after I reread what I wrote it seems that I whinge a lot and you know, actually... on the inside I'm very happy :) I just want to get better! Whingers are amongst my least favourite human traits... and I hope that I never become one of those tiring people who complains all the time!!! And to you who bother to spend a few minutes to catch up on how I'm doing, I promise that I will do better next week so that I don't get upset and you won't have to read about it but it's hardddd as I am never one to lower the bar just to be content. Reach for the stars and all that right?

Bla bla bla. You have listened (read) enough for now, until next week maybe.

Melinda xx

Ps. I had my first visitor on Saturday. This lady who I used to work with, who in the past few years occasionally would say to me that I didn't belong in Australia I belong in Paris. She was the one who planted me the seed in my head last year and who would've thought that one year later I'm here. Thank you and love you Sandra! xx

The short week

Three days of school only then a 4 day long weekend! Woo hoo!! So this week... we had a substitute teacher, it was my turn to be chef of the week and we had another art class and art class = art homework plus we were also to hand in the preliminary recipes for our creative project on the same day. I never thought that I would ever find this hashtag appropriate for me but... #schoollyfe!

I think I might had mentioned in passing about our final project; we are to present to a panel, 6 creative individual babas and 2 tartes where by we are free to select our 2 flavours which would have to be present in both baba and tarte. When we had first been told of the project I thought eeeeekkkk!! how scary especially anything to do with the art work we have to present. But as time passes I am getting a bit more excited about this exercise. Maybe.... I can do this.

Art class was on Wednesday morning for 4 hours and even though I was better prepared with my art homework but I stayed up until after 1.30 am to make sure that I selected recipes that are quasi final for at least the basic elements of the creative challenge. So as the day started my battery was only at 65%. Pascal is really nice and to be fair, some of us had spent hours on the homework and so to have him examining each work for like 10 minutes, was a very nice gesture.

Anyway, consequently the class did run 40 minutes late so lunch for me wasn't an option. I should had already been in the lab 10 minutes ago, my hunger was already gone! but my battery was at the most, 40% and I was looking forward to the end of the day very much. Luckily it was the substitute teacher and he doesn't arrive normally until the time the class starts. So yeah, by the way for the three days we had a different chef and I am still TS. Team Stévy haha.

Let's not dwell too much as to why I didn't really enjoy the past 3 days. I'll tell you one of them though. I am in the please and thank you camp and so I don't appreaciate it when someone superior in rank swear when giving orders. I am not in the army nor in the navy! I am not opposed to people who swear if only sparingly and I even find it funny when used in the right context. But when he yelled I want the effing this and effing that, sorry no matter he said it to the whole class I don't like it and in my eyes he went down one rank. We will have another 2 weeks with a different substitute teacher who I heard from a friend in the cuisine class, swears a lot. Crap! Maybe I should expect the worse and so hopefully would be pleasantly surprised.

We made babas this week, and so it should had been a crucial learning week for us because simple as it may look, from what I read and seen there are important rules to follow to have them soaked properly etc. I felt though that we weren't explained enough and all week it felt a bit like an amateur baking class where the teacher was just there to ensure that our bake would come out ok.

On Monday apparently some of us prepared the crème mascarpone for the baba. I was a bit pissed because I completely missed it. What when how, why weren't we get called to watch how it's done. Anyway, the following day it went missing. Apparently it had been thrown away, because it had no label. I had NO IDEA that the stupid cream had been made, let alone knew where it's been kept in the fridge. I thought I had checked the bowls and containers in the walk-in fridge that they had been labelled before I left on Monday, nobody blamed me but I was still a bit upset at myself that it went 'undetected' because I should had had picked that up. GRRRRR.

Apart from the baba, luckily the other 2 tarts were pretty simple, and the barquettes marrons were also not super difficult, apart from the piping. My piping is horrid, I need to practice because it is really annoying me. Though in this photo they look especially ghastly because I had to carry many things that day, art class stuff, dirty uniform, a box and these barquettes unprotected in a cake carrier running down rue de Rennes to meet a friend. My piping is not THAT bad. Otherwise, the lab this week was a breeze actually, a lot of standing around.

Ok, enough rant about school because it's an extra long weekend and the weather in Paris is simply incroyable!!! Four day weekend is the best, I have enough time for everything... straigthening my hair, writing this post, cat naps, ironing my uniforms, a long bath etc.

On Thursday night we had a pot luck night at Raz's and the food looks amazing! I slow roasted a lamb shoulder for about 6 hours but I think it could've done with another few hours in the oven! And it's a bit too salty for me, and the lamb's flavour is different compared to lamb in Australia. A bit too strong for my liking. I can critisize it to death, it's my dish. Everybody else's dishes though were really good especially the panaeng curry! Yummers!

After dinner we played three rounds of twister, such a fun night ... I'm gonna say it again, I am so lucky to be in group A.

Next week we are making a croquembouche apparently. I'm looking forward to that.... I love choux.

Melinda xx